8. The Art of Personality
8. 人格風範的藝術

Individuality and Personality
個體性與人格風範

Some believe that art is inferior to nature. But that is not so. Art completes nature; in art there is something divine, for it is God Himself who through man completes the beauty of nature, and this is called art. In other words, art is not only an imitation of nature, art is an improvement upon nature, be it painting, drawing, poetry, or music. But the best of all arts is the art of personality. This must be learned, in order to use it in every walk of life. It is not necessary for every man to become a musician, nor is it necessary to become a painter or an architect. But it is necessary for every man to learn the art of personality.

有些人認為，藝術不如自然。但事實並非如此。藝術使自然更加完整；藝術之中有某種神聖的事物，因為正是神自己透過人，使自然之美得以完成，而這就稱為藝術。換句話說，藝術不只是模仿自然，更是使自然有所提升，無論是繪畫、素描、詩歌或音樂皆然。然而，在一切藝術之中，最高的藝術是人格風範的藝術。我們必須學習這門藝術，才能在人生的各個領域運用它。並不是每個人都需要成為音樂家，也不需要成為畫家或建築師；但每個人都需要學習人格風範的藝術。

Someone once came to me and said with great pride and satisfaction, “I was brought up by my parents just like a plant in the forest, growing naturally.” I answered, “It is a pity. If your parents wanted you to grow naturally they should have kept you in the forest. It is a pity that you are in the midst of the world. The world is made by art; in order to be in the world you need to know the art of personality.’

曾經有人來找我，十分驕傲而滿意地說：「我的父母養育我，就像森林裡的一株植物一樣，讓我自然地生長。」我回答：「那真可惜。如果你的父母想讓你自然生長，他們就應該把你留在森林裡。可惜你如今身在人世之中。這個世界是由藝術塑造的；要生活在這個世界上，你就需要懂得人格風範的藝術。」

Very few of us distinguish between individuality and personality. Individuality is that which we brought with us at our birth; we are born as a separate entity. That itself makes us individual. Individuality is the soul’s consciousness of its oneness, in spite of its various belongings with which it still identifies itself; and that individuality can be seen in the child which says, “No, I don’t want this toy, I want that other toy.” The moment the soul says “I” it becomes conscious of an individuality in spite of having different organs in the body and different thoughts which direct these organs. Then the tendency is to attribute to oneself all the different parts while realizing that one is one in spite of being many, or in other words, in spite of being composed of many aspects.

我們之中很少有人能分辨個體性與人格風範。個體性是我們出生時便帶來的；我們一出生，就是一個獨立的存在，這本身便使我們成為一個個體。個體性是靈魂對自身為一體的意識，儘管它仍認同於種種附屬於它的事物。這種個體性可以在孩子身上看見；孩子會說：「不，我不要這個玩具，我要那一個。」當靈魂說出「我」的那一刻，它便意識到自己的個體性，儘管身體有不同的器官，也有不同的思想在指揮這些器官。於是，我們傾向於把這些不同的部分都歸於自己，同時知道，儘管自己包含許多部分，仍然是一體的；換句話說，儘管我們由許多不同面向所構成，我們依然是一。

Personality is an improvement on individuality. In becoming a person the beauty which is hidden in an individual develops itself, and it is the development of the individuality which is personality. Individuality is nature, whereas personality is art; it is something that is acquired or gained. It has not come with us.

人格風範，是個體性進一步發展後的成果。當一個人成為真正意義上的「人」時，隱藏在個體之中的美便逐漸展現出來；而個體性的這種發展，便形成人格風範。個體性屬於自然，而人格風範屬於藝術；它是後天習得、逐漸獲得的，並不是我們與生俱來的。

Therefore in ancient times people had to learn and practice the art of personality as part of their education. That was the ancient culture. Today a person has to pass examinations and as long as he has got a degree he thinks he is safe, he thinks he can go into the world and will get on. But such an external qualification is not enough. It is the inner qualification, the inner culture that counts and it can only be obtained by the development of personality.

因此，在古代，人們必須把學習與實踐人格風範的藝術視為教育的一部分。這就是古代的文化。今日，一個人必須通過考試，而只要取得了學位，便以為自己有了保障，以為自己可以進入社會，順利立足。然而，這種外在的資格並不足夠。真正重要的是內在的素養、內在的文化，而這只能透過人格風範的培養而獲得。

How does one make use of personality? In business the salesman makes a success according to the power of his magnetism; his influence depends entirely on his personality. It is his personality that attracts, whether he goes to a shop or to other business; it is his personality which stands out and which gives one the idea of buying or selling or dealing with him; and the lack of this makes one go away never to come back. A statesman, a politician, a teacher, a solicitor, a barrister, a lawyer, all require personality. A physician may be a great physician, a highly qualified one, and yet if his personality is not agreeable, if he is rude or unsympathetic, however many patients he may have his medicines will make them feel bad, and his personality will make them feel worse. And very often a doctor with a sympathetic personality, a good manner, and wisdom, can cure a patient by a word of consolation before he has given him any medicine. It is the same with a barrister, a lawyer. He can dishearten a client in one visit; and when a person has lost courage and hope then naturally there is little chance of being successful. Power of mind is needed, and if the power of mind is strong then a lawyer can succeed. In all walks of life what counts is the personality. The one whose personality is against him has the world against him.

那麼，一個人要如何運用自己的風範呢？在商業上，銷售人員能否成功，取決於他的磁力有多強；他的影響力完全取決於他的個人氣質。無論是在商店裡，還是在其他商業往來中，真正吸引人的都是他所展現出的風度與氣質；使他在人群中顯得突出，使人願意與他買賣、交易的，也是這些特質。如果缺少了這一點，人便會離去，再也不回來。政治家、從政者、老師、事務律師、出庭律師與法律工作者，全都需要良好的風範。一位醫師或許醫術高明、資格完備，然而如果他的待人方式令人不悅，態度粗魯，又缺乏同理心，那麼無論他有多少病人，他的藥或許已使病人感覺不好，而他的態度只會使他們感覺更糟。反之，一位富有同理心、舉止得宜而有智慧的醫師，往往在還沒有給病人任何藥物之前，僅憑一句安慰的話，就已經能為病人帶來療癒。出庭律師與法律工作者也是如此。他一次會面就可能使當事人灰心喪志；而當一個人失去了勇氣與希望，自然也就很難成功。這需要頭腦的力量；如果頭腦的力量強大，一位律師就能有所成就。無論在哪一種人生領域，真正重要的都是一個人的風範。一個人的風範若反而成了自己的阻礙，彷彿整個世界也都與他為敵。

Four Categories of Personality
四種性情類型

(Updated from the original lecture of May 13, 1926)

（根據 1926 年 5 月 13 日原始演講更新）

No doubt, there are four categories of personality. The first one is the person whose personality is likened to walnut, the other is like grapes, the other like date, and the fourth is like pomegranate.

毫無疑問，人的性情可以分為四種類型。第一種好比核桃，另一種像葡萄，另一種像椰棗，第四種則像石榴。

• The date-like personality is soft outside and hard inside. As soon as one takes a date in the mouth, as soon as the seed comes under the teeth, one has horror of it.
  
  椰棗型的性情，外柔而內硬。一把椰棗放入口中，一旦牙齒咬到果核，便會感到十分不舒服。

• And then there is the other personality which is walnut-like. There is a hard shell, hard to penetrate. But when you know the person more, it is like breaking the walnut, and there comes a nut which is soft.
  還有一種像核桃的性情。外面有一層堅硬的殼，很難突破；但當你對這個人有了更深的認識，就像剝開核桃的硬殼，裡面便露出柔軟的果仁。

• And then there is a pomegranate personality. It is hard outside and hard inside. The pomegranate is hard, the cover is hard, and at the same time the seed inside is hard too.
  
  還有一種石榴型的性情，外硬而內也硬。石榴本身是硬的，外皮是硬的，而裡面的籽也是硬的。

• And then there is the grape personality which is soft outside and soft inside.
  
  最後是葡萄型的性情，外柔而內也柔。

You will always find these four classes of persons.

我們總會遇見這四類人。

• The personality of one who is hard outside is repellant first, but in the end you will become his friend. Therefore, he has always lost his friends. You understand him only when you come to the inner being of this man. Therefore, he will always lose his friends.
  
  外在堅硬的人，一開始會令人卻步，但到最後，你可能會成為他的朋友。也因此，他總是容易失去朋友。只有當你接觸到這個人的內在，才真正了解他；而在那以前，他往往已經失去了許多朋友。

• And the one whose personality is soft outside and hard inside will at once attract people, but they will not stay with him. They will stay for some time, but then they leave him. Then they know him and go away from him.
  
  外柔內硬的人會立刻吸引別人，但別人不會長久留在他身邊。他們會停留一段時間，之後便離開；當他們真正認識他之後，就會遠離他。

• And the person whose personality is hard outside and hard inside is isolated in this world. This is not the place for him. Everyone will want to keep away from him. And after some time he will find himself in a difficulty.
  
  至於外硬內也硬的人，在這個世界上會變得孤立。這個世界彷彿沒有他的容身之處，每個人都想與他保持距離；久而久之，他便會發現自己陷入困境。

• And the one whose personality is soft outside and soft inside naturally will be most magnetic. The grape is the most attractive fruit.
  
  而外柔內也柔的人，自然最富有吸引力。葡萄是最令人喜愛的果實。

Four Aspects of Magnetism
磁力的四個面向

At every stage in the evolution of man there is a different kind of magnetism. There are four different aspects of magnetism: physical magnetism, intellectual magnetism, sympathetic magnetism which is sometimes called personal magnetism, and spiritual magnetism.

在人發展的每一個階段，都有一種不同的磁力。磁力共有四個不同的面向：身體的磁力、智性的磁力、同理的磁力——有時也稱為個人磁力——以及靈性的磁力。

1. Physical Magnetism
身體的磁力

Freshness, purity, good health, cleanliness, harmonious movements, regular form, all these help physical magnetism.

清新、純淨、良好的健康、潔淨、和諧的動作與勻稱的形體，這一切都有助於身體磁力的形成。

2. intellectual Sympathy
智性的同理心

Every man who is loving, affectionate, kindly, gentle, and who has developed a sympathetic nature will always attract without knowing it; for sympathy has the greatest power, and this magnetism is lasting. In whatever relationship you may be to a person, if there is no link of sympathy there is no attraction.

凡是一個有愛、富有情感、仁慈、溫和，並且發展出同理天性的人，總會在自己毫無察覺的情況下吸引別人；因為同理具有極大的力量，而這種磁力是持久的。無論你與一個人處於何種關係之中，如果彼此之間沒有同理的連結，也就沒有真正的吸引力。

By the lack of development of the sympathetic nature a blockage is produced in the mind and in the body. In the physical body there are some nerve centers which are awakened by the development of sympathy; otherwise they are closed. It is for this reason that a butcher will seldom be intuitive, as everything that keeps a man away from sympathy robs him of intuition.

如果同理的天性沒有得到發展，頭腦與身體之中便會形成阻塞。肉體中有一些神經中樞，會隨著同理心的發展而甦醒；否則，它們便處於封閉狀態。正因如此，屠夫很少具有直覺，因為任何使人遠離同理心的事物，都會奪走他的直覺。

3. Sympathetic Magnetism
同理的磁力

Sympathy develops life in the finer centers, and the absence of that sympathy takes away that life. And so it is with the mind; when the heart is not sympathetic there is something missing in the man’s mentality. Very often a person may be highly qualified, very intellectual, imposing in appearance, and yet being without feeling he will lack magnetism and in many cases will fail to succeed because of his lack of sympathy.

同理使較精微的中心獲得生命，而缺乏同理，則會使這份生命消失。頭腦也是如此；當一顆心缺少同理時，人的心智之中便少了某種東西。一個人往往可能具備很高的資格，十分聰明，外表也令人印象深刻，然而如果缺乏感受，他便會缺少磁力；在許多情況下，也會因為缺乏同理而難以成功。

4. Spiritual Magnetism
靈性的磁力

The fourth kind of magnetism is spiritual magnetism. It can be recognized in the innocence of a man, in his purity, in his simplicity. A spiritual person is considered very evolved, but in his appearance the spiritual person may be the most simple, the most innocent one. He is not ignorant but less complicated, broader in outlook, keener in perception, with lofty ideals, with a high consciousness; and yet humble and democratic in the true sense of the word.

第四種磁力是靈性的磁力。我們可以從一個人的純真、純淨與樸實之中認出它。靈性之人被視為發展得很高的人，但從外表來看，他反而可能是最樸實、最純真的人。他並非無知，而是較少複雜；他的眼界更寬廣，覺察更加敏銳，有崇高的理想與較高的意識，卻又謙遜，並在真正的意義上具有民主精神。

Democracy
民主

The idea of democracy is wrongly understood by many today. The principle that “I am as good as you” is a wrong principle of democracy. It takes away humbleness, gentleness, and the high ideal. Besides how childish to think that camphor and bone, chalk and sugar are all equal! It seems a very kind idea that everybody is equal; but when you tune the piano with all the notes at the same pitch there is no more music. This wrong conception of democracy is like tuning the whole piano to the same note; then the music of the soul becomes dull. It is more an obsession with democracy than democracy itself.

今日，許多人錯誤理解了民主的觀念。「我和你一樣好」這項原則，是對民主錯誤的理解。它會使人失去謙遜、溫和與崇高的理想。此外，認為樟腦與骨頭、粉筆與糖全都一樣，又是多麼幼稚！人人平等聽起來似乎是一種十分仁厚的觀念；然而，如果把鋼琴上所有的音都調成同一個音高，就再也沒有音樂了。這種對民主的錯誤理解，就像把整架鋼琴都調成同一個音；於是，靈魂的音樂便失去了光彩。這與其說是民主，不如說是對民主觀念的執著。

Real democracy is raising oneself higher by appreciating the ideal one meets. In this way one rises to a higher ideal; but many people do not appreciate a high ideal. Democracy means being equal on a higher plane instead of being ignorant. Pulling a high person down to the earth and then speaking of democracy is wrong democracy; it is the spirit of the revolutionary, of people who are obsessed by one particular idea, regardless of anything else, as has been seen in many places.

真正的民主，是透過欣賞自己所遇見的崇高典範，而使自己提升。如此，一個人便能提升至更高的理想；然而，許多人並不懂得欣賞崇高的理想。民主的意義，是在更高的層次上達到平等，而不是停留於無知。把一個處於高處的人拉到地面上，再把這稱為民主，便是錯誤的民主；這是一種革命者的精神，是人被某一個特定觀念所佔據，而不顧其他一切的狀態，這在許多地方都曾出現過。

For instance, when there came a revolt against the Catholic Church, what happened? The revolt was not only against the Church, but against the ideals of the Church. Every good aspect was disregarded. It was not only a revolt against what was not desirable, but against everything connected with it. It is from that time that the sense and depth of religion which existed in the Western world seem to have been diminishing, and they are diminishing further every day. In spite of the many churches there is less idealism. The ideal which is necessary in some form or other for every soul has been drowned. It is drowned because people have revolted against something regardless of what is good in it.

例如，當人們起而反抗天主教會時，發生了什麼？那場反抗不只是針對教會，也針對教會所代表的理想。其中一切美好的面向都被忽視了。人們不只是反抗其中不合宜的部分，也反抗一切與之相關的事物。從那個時候開始，西方世界原先具有的宗教感與宗教深度，似乎逐漸減弱，而且日復一日仍在繼續減弱。儘管教堂很多，理想主義卻更少了。每一個靈魂都以某種形式需要的理想，被淹沒了。它之所以被淹沒，是因為人們反抗某件事物時，沒有顧及其中仍然存在的美好。

When a person disregards the God-ideal his tendency is to disregard everything that is related to it. And so the art of personality has been lost in the obsession with democracy, instead of being realized as a higher spiritual evolution. It is the spiritual outlook alone that gives man real democratic feeling; it means that for such a person any other man, be it his enemy or his great friend, is his parent, his brother. The spiritual man sees everyone as himself. He sees his own spirit, his own soul reflected in the other; that is real democracy, when one sees oneself in both a higher and a lower person. That is the highest ideal of spiritual attainment, and that is what makes man really democratic.

當一個人不再重視神的理想，他往往也會不再重視一切與它相關的事物。於是，人格風範的藝術便在人們對民主觀念的執著之中失落了，而沒有被理解為一種更高的靈性發展。唯有靈性的眼光，才能賦予人真正的民主精神；對這樣的人而言，任何另一個人，無論是他的敵人還是摯友，都是他的父母、他的手足。靈性之人從每一個人身上看見自己。他在他人之中看見自己的靈、自己的靈魂映照其中；當一個人無論面對比自己高或比自己低的人，都能從中看見自己，那才是真正的民主。這是靈性成就最高的理想，而正是這一點，使人真正具有民主精神。

One only rises to such an ideal by degrees. And the first degree is gentleness. That is why in the English language the word gentleman was used. Why gentle? Because he had taken the first step towards the art of personality. It is not necessary for a person to be rich, or to be in a good position, or to hold a high rank; that does not necessarily make him gentle. However high the position and rank one may have, one may still not be gentle. Once a person has become thoughtful his first step is to become gentle; as soon as thoughtfulness is developed in him, he takes his first step towards real evolution.

我們只能一步一步地提升到這樣的理想。而第一步就是溫和。這也就是英語為何使用 gentleman（紳士）這個詞。為什麼是 gentle——「溫和」？因為他已經朝人格風範的藝術踏出了第一步。一個人並不需要富有，也不需要有良好的社會地位或崇高的身分；這些並不必然使他成為一個溫和的人。無論一個人的地位與身分多麼崇高，他仍然可能並不溫和。當一個人開始懂得體貼與顧念他人時，他的第一步便是變得溫和；一旦這份體貼在他內在發展起來，他便踏出了走向真正發展的第一步。

Gentleness is the greatest power of all. Gentleness is like the power of water: water is purifying, and if there is a rock in the path of a stream of water it will surround the rock; it will not break it, for water is pliable, and so is the one who is gentle. Gentleness in the long run will always purify everything.

溫和是一切力量中最強大的力量。溫和就像水的力量：水能淨化；當溪流的道路上有一塊岩石時，水會環繞岩石而流，不會將它擊碎，因為水是柔韌的，溫和的人也是如此。長久而言，溫和終將淨化一切。

We might imagine that everyone tries to be thoughtful. And yet when we consider two things in our daily life — when silence is needed and when speech — we find that we make a thousand mistakes. Often we speak more than we need to speak; or we give our confidence to someone to whom it would have been better not to have given it, or we have spoken to someone and we should not have done it. But it is too late when we think of it afterwards. Sometimes in a mood of haste, or opposition, or in a distressed condition, a person might say something hurtful without meaning it. He says it and then he repents. By speaking he has not gained anything, except that it might have been a pastime, it has released a desire to say something. But afterwards it has a result just the same.

我們或許以為，每個人都試著成為一個體貼而周到的人。然而，只要看看日常生活中的兩件事——什麼時候應當沉默，什麼時候應當說話——便會發現我們犯下了無數錯誤。我們常常說得比需要的更多；或者把心裡的事告訴了一個其實不該託付的人；又或者對某人說了原本不該說的話。等到事後想起來時，已經太遲了。有時人在匆忙、對立或苦惱的狀態下，可能無意間說出傷人的話。話一出口，便開始後悔。說了這些話，他其實什麼也沒有得到；或許只是一時消遣，或只是滿足了想把某句話說出口的欲望。然而話說出去之後，仍然會產生它的後果。

The heart of man is so delicate; it is just like a fragile glass, and once it is broken is very difficult to mend. Any hurt and harm once given is never really mended. One can apologize and ask forgiveness; but what is done is done; what is said is said. The word is not lost. Every word we speak remains somewhere: in the heart of the one listening, in space or in the ground, it stays and has some result. Moreover, by learning to be thoughtful one develops dignity in one’s nature. The more one thinks of others the more dignified one becomes, because dignity springs from thoughtfulness.

人的心如此細緻，就像一只易碎的玻璃器皿，一旦破裂，便很難修補。造成的傷害一旦發生，從來無法真正完全修復。我們可以道歉，也可以請求原諒；然而，做過的已經做了，說過的也已經說了。話語並不會消失。我們說出的每一句話，都會留在某個地方：留在聽者的心裡，留在空間之中，或留在大地之上；它會停留，並產生某種結果。此外，藉由學習體貼與周到，一個人的天性中也會發展出尊嚴。我們愈能顧念他人，就愈顯得有尊嚴，因為尊嚴源自對他人的體貼與顧念。

Then very often a person makes a habit of being talkative. He wastes his own time, his own thought, and the thought and time of the other person; and very often it ends in confusion. One accomplishes nothing by useless arguments. It is amusing to notice that very often a person argues because he lacks knowledge. He goes on arguing because he does not know, he wants to find out from the other person what he knows about it. Besides, how can one understand by discussing or arguing that which one can only understand by one’s own wisdom, by the intuition within? It is very often a loss of time.

人也常常養成多話的習慣。他浪費自己的時間與思想，也浪費別人的思想與時間；而最後往往只造成混亂。無益的爭辯成就不了任何事情。很有意思的是，我們常會發現，一個人之所以不斷爭辯，正是因為他缺乏知識。他不停爭論，是因為自己不知道，於是想從對方那裡探出對方究竟知道些什麼。更何況，有些事情只能藉由自己的智慧、藉由內在的直覺才能明白，又怎能靠討論或爭辯來理解？這往往只是在浪費時間。

Some have a real passion for talking; to them it is an amusement, a pastime. But in the end they exhaust themselves and become nervous, and nothing is gained. Silence seems sometimes very hard to keep, but surely it has great advantages, as disagreement and inharmony can often be avoided by it. Silence is good for both the wise and the foolish. For the wise man it is good because it avoids unnecessary talk; he can keep his precious thought well cherished within himself; and so he rears the good thought which is like a plant. And the foolish one covers up his stupidity as long as he keeps silent, and so much the better. Silence raises the dignity of the wise and hides the stupidity of the foolish.

有些人對說話有一種真正的熱衷；對他們而言，說話是一種娛樂、一種消遣。但到最後，他們使自己筋疲力盡，變得緊張不安，卻一無所得。沉默有時似乎很難保持，但它確實有很大的益處，因為許多分歧與不和，都可以藉由沉默而避免。沉默對智者與愚者都有好處。對智者而言，它使人免於不必要的言談；他可以把珍貴的思想好好珍藏在自己內在，讓美好的思想如植物一般被培育成長。而愚者只要保持沉默，便能掩藏自己的愚昧，那反而更好。沉默提升智者的尊嚴，也遮掩愚者的愚昧。

Besides the more one evolves the more one will discover the different grades of people, just like the different keys on the piano. One is lower, another is higher; every person has a different grade of evolution. Also, the higher you evolve the more you will find that you cannot drive everyone with the same whip. You have to speak to everyone differently, in fact in his own language. If you speak a language he does not understand, it will be gibberish to him. If he is less evolved he will abuse you for what you have said. If he is highly evolved and you say something which does not reach his state of evolution it will make you small in his eyes. What is the use? Besides you will always find that inharmony is caused unnecessarily by words. On the other hand, however inharmonious the atmosphere created by other persons may be, if you have the words of wisdom you can dissolve the clouds of inharmony.

此外，一個人發展得愈高，就愈會發現人們有著不同的層次，就像鋼琴上不同的琴鍵。有的較低，有的較高；每個人都處於不同的發展程度。你愈向上發展，也愈會明白，不可能用同一條鞭子驅策所有的人。你必須以不同的方式與每個人說話，事實上，要用他自己的語言與他說話。如果你使用他不懂的語言，那對他而言只是一堆莫名其妙的話。如果他的發展程度較低，他可能因你所說的話而辱罵你；如果他的發展程度很高，而你說的話又達不到他的層次，你在他眼中便顯得渺小。那又有什麼意義？此外，我們總會發現，許多不和其實都是由言語無謂地造成的。另一方面，無論別人造成的氣氛多麼不和諧，只要你擁有智慧的言語，便能化解那片不和的陰雲。

Once when traveling I met a man of a very dense evolution, a soldier who always lived in military surroundings and who had very fixed ideas of his own. And when we were talking together and it appeared that we thought differently about something, I happened to say in order to preserve harmony, “Well, we are brothers!” He looked at me with great anger, and said, “Brothers! How dare you say such a thing!” I said, “I forgot. I am your servant, Sir.” He was very pleased. I could have argued, but this would have created disharmony without reason. The foolishness of that man blazed up just like fire; I put water on it and extinguished it. I did not diminish myself; we are all servants of one another; and it pleased and satisfied him.

有一次旅行途中，我遇到一個發展程度十分粗鈍的人。他是一名軍人，一直生活在軍隊的環境裡，對自己的觀念非常固執。我們交談時，發現彼此對某件事看法不同；為了維持和諧，我隨口說道：「沒關係，我們都是兄弟！」他非常生氣地看著我，說：「兄弟！你怎麼敢說這種話！」我便說：「我忘了。先生，我是您的僕人。」他立刻非常高興。我本來可以與他爭辯，但那只會毫無必要地製造不和。那個人的愚昧像火一樣突然燃起；我往上面澆了水，把火熄滅。我並沒有因此貶低自己；我們本來就是彼此的僕人，而這句話也使他高興、滿足。

There is a story of a wise healer. A woman went to him and asked, “Can you tell me what to do? I am having a difficult time with my husband. There is a quarrel at home every day.” He said, “That is very easy.” She said, “I would be so grateful.” He said, “I will give you these lozenges, these sweets. You keep them in your mouth when your husband comes home and all will be well. They are magnetized sweets.” And every day she noticed that there was no quarrel any more.

有一個關於一位智慧療癒者的故事。一名女子來找他，問道：「你能不能告訴我該怎麼辦？我和丈夫相處得非常辛苦，家裡每天都在爭吵。」他說：「這很容易。」她說：「如果你能幫助我，我會非常感激。」他說：「我給你一些含片、一些糖果。當你的丈夫回家時，就把它們含在嘴裡，一切都會好起來。這些是經過磁化的糖果。」之後她每天都發現，家裡真的不再爭吵了。

After ten days when the sweets were finished she went back to the healer and said, “I would give anything if you could let me have some more of those sweets. They were wonderful.” Then the teacher said, “My friend, you must understand after eating the sweets for ten days, that your husband, having toiled all day, is nervous and tired and weary when he comes home. Naturally he is not in tune; and you made him worse by talking. By keeping silent you gave him nothing to quarrel about, and your home became more harmonious. This should teach you a lesson: that silence is the key to harmony.’

十天之後，糖果吃完了，她又回到那位療癒者那裡，說：「只要你能再給我一些那種糖果，要我付出什麼都可以。它們實在太神奇了。」這時老師說：「我的朋友，吃了十天的糖果之後，你應該已經明白：你的丈夫辛苦工作了一整天，回到家時神經緊繃、疲累而倦怠，自然不在和諧的狀態之中；而你一開口說話，只會使他的狀態更糟。當你保持沉默時，你沒有給他任何可以爭吵的東西，因此你的家庭變得更加和諧。這件事應該讓你學到一課：沉默是通往和諧的鑰匙。」

---