2. The Desire for Life
2. 生命的渴望

The desire to live is not only seen among human beings but it is also seen continually working through the most insignificant little creatures creeping on earth and living in the ground. When one sees how even the smallest insect wishes to avoid any pursuit after it and how it seeks shelter against any attempt made to touch it, fearing that its life may be taken away from it, that shows that even the smallest creature in the world, in whom man cannot find a trace of mind, has a desire to live. It is this desire that, developing in the lower creation in many and varied aspects, shows in fear, in the tendency to seek shelter, in the intelligent way of looking round as the hare does in the fields, as the deer that is continually careful to protect itself from other animals.

在世間，渴望生存不僅存在於人類之中，也不斷地呈現在那些最微小、匍匐於地面或土壤中的生物身上。當人看到，即使是最細小的昆蟲，也會設法避開追捕，並在他人試圖觸碰牠時尋找庇護，害怕自己的生命會被奪走；這便顯示，即便是世界上最微小、在人類眼中幾乎看不出有頭腦痕跡的生物，也擁有生存的渴望。正是這股渴望，在較低層次的生命中，以各種方式展現──以恐懼的形式、以尋求庇護的本能、以聰敏環顧四周的動作呈現，如田野間環視動靜的野兔，或不斷警覺、保護自己免受其他動物侵害的鹿。

This desire developed in man shows still greater phenomena of intelligence. War and peace are brought about with the desire of living; the cause behind war is the desire to live; the cause of peace is also the desire to live. There is not one normal soul living on earth who has not the desire to live. Yes, a person most distressed, in a mood of unhappiness, will say at the moment, “I would rather not live; I seek death.” But it is not the normal condition.

而當這種渴望在人類身上發展之後，便展現出更高度的智慧現象。戰與和皆是出於生存的渴望；戰爭背後的原因是生存的渴望，和平背後的原因也是生存的渴望。世上沒有一個正常的靈魂不渴望活著。確實，有人可能在極度痛苦、深陷不幸情緒之時說出：「我不想活了；我只求死亡。」但那並非人的正常狀態。

One may say, “Why is death not a desirable thing, since it is only a getting rid of the dense body?” But can we not turn the dense body into a light body? Even matter can turn into Spirit. If the divine blood begins to circulate through the veins of a person, this body is no longer a heavy body; it becomes as light as vapor. It is heavy when the weight of the earth has fallen upon it, but when the weight of the earth is taken away from it, it is lighter than the air.

有人可能會說：「既然死亡只是擺脫沉重的肉身，為何死亡不可取呢？」但我們難道不能讓沉重的身體化為輕盈之身嗎？甚至連物質都能轉化為靈（Spirit）。如果神性的血液開始在一個人的血脈中流動，這個身體就不再沉重，而會變得像蒸氣般輕盈。它之所以沉重，是因為背負著大地的重量；而當那份重量被拿走，它便比空氣還輕。

‘But”, one may say, “is not death an increase of life?” It is another phase of life. The body is a complete instrument; why should we not make the best of it? Why must one hasten death, if one can be here and do something worth while? Sometimes one longs for death because one does not know what one is to do here; one is not yet acquainted with the Purpose of life; it is that which makes one long for death. Every moment in life has its mission; every moment in life is an opportunity. Why should this opportunity be lost? Why not use every moment of one’s life towards the accomplishment of that Purpose for which we are here? It is the question of bestirring ourselves to make the best use of every moment of life. That itself will give such a happiness to a person that he will not wish to go. Even if the angels of death came and were dragging him towards death, he will say, “Let me stay here a while longer; let me finish something which I would like to finish.’

但也有人會說：「死亡不是生命的增長嗎？」死亡只是生命的另一個階段。身體是完整的工具，我們為何不善加運用？如果人在世還能做些有價值的事，為何要急著奔向死亡？有時人之所以渴求死亡，是因為不知自己在此該做什麼；因為尚未明白生命的目的，因此才渴望死亡。生命中的每一刻都有其使命；每一刻都是機會。為什麼要錯過這樣的機會？為什麼不把生命中的每一刻，都用來完成我們來到此世的那個目的？關鍵在於，願不願意振作起來，把生命的每一刻都用到最恰當之處。光是這樣，就能帶給人如此的喜悅，使他不願離開。即使死亡的天使前來拖著他走，他仍會說：「讓我再留一會兒；讓我完成我還想完成的事。」

That must be the attitude. When a person is in his normal condition of mind, his one desire, his innermost desire, is to live. What does it show? It shows that man has acquired all other desires after coming on earth, but this desire to live he has brought with him on earth. Only that, by not understanding the meaning of this desire, its nature and character, its secret, he submits to its being broken by what is called death, by mortality.

這必須是我們的態度。當一個人的心智處於正常狀態時，他唯一的渴望、他最深處的渴望，就是活著。這說明了什麼？這說明人類在來到世間後才獲得了其他所有的欲望，唯獨「想活下去」這個欲望，是他帶著來到世上的。只是因為不理解這個欲望的意義、它的本質與特性、它的秘密，他才會任由這個欲望被「死亡」、被「必朽性」所打破。

If the desire to live is his innermost desire, if it is a divine substance in him, then there is the answer to this desire also; there is a possibility of the fulfillment of this desire. But when one does not dive deep into the secrets of life, without the knowledge of life and death one becomes subject to disappointment, and that disappointment is death. One may say, “If the desire to live is natural, would it not be better to live and prolong the youthfulness of body; and how can that be done?”

如果「想活著」是他內心最深處的渴望，是他體內的神聖成分，那麼這渴望必然也有其答案；它也必然有被成全的可能。然而若不深入生命的秘密，在不理解生命與死亡的情況下，人便會受制於失望，而那份失望就是死亡。有人可能會問：「如果活著的渴望是天性的，那麼延續生命、延長身體的青春不是更好嗎？那又要如何做到？」

There are three aspects the Hindus have personified, as Brahma, Vishnu, and Maheish (Shiva), the Creator-God, the Sustainer-God, and the Destroyer-God. In retaining youth there comes the conflict between the two Gods, the Creator-God and the Destroyer-God, because the Destroyer-God is destroying, the Creator-God is creating. If the Creator-God in you is stronger, then he will win a victory over the Destroyer-God. Nevertheless, there is nothing which is void of beauty in this world. If the soul has received the divine blessing, it will enjoy every aspect of life.

在印度思想中，有三種被人格化的神性面向：梵天（Brahma）——造物之神、毗濕奴（Vishnu）——維持之神，以及濕婆（Maheish / Shiva）——毀壞之神。要保持青春，便意味著造物之神與毀壞之神之間的衝突：因為毀壞之神在破壞，而造物之神在創造。如果你內在的造物之神較為強大，他便能戰勝毀壞之神。然而，世間沒有任何事物是不具有美的。若一個靈魂得到了神聖的祝福，它便能享受生命的每一個層面。

Infancy is interesting, childhood has a beauty, youth has its spirit, age has its knowledge and dignity, its wisdom and beauty. There is no note on the piano which has not its particular action, which has not its particular part in the symphony of nature. Whether it is the seventh octave lower or the seventh octave higher, whether it is sharp or flat or natural, whatever key it is, as soon as the harmonious hand has touched it, it creates harmony, it makes of it a symphony. And so we are all as notes before that divine Musician, and when His blessing hand touches, whatever be one’s life’s condition, whether child or youthful or old or young, the beauty will manifest and add to life’s symphony.

嬰兒期有其趣味，童年有其美，青春有其活力，老年則具有其知識與莊嚴，其智慧與美。鋼琴上沒有一個音符不是為了某種特殊的作用、不是為了在大自然的交響樂中擔任特定的角色而存在。無論是第七個低八度或第七個高八度，無論是升、降，或是本位音，任何一個音，只要被和諧的手指觸碰，便會生出和聲，化為整體的交響樂。同樣地，我們在那位神聖的音樂家面前也如同音符一般──當祂的祝福之手觸及我們時，無論我們的生命在什麼樣的狀況、無論我們是孩童、青年、中年或老年，生命的美便會顯現，並為生命的交響添加光彩。

The mistake is that man wishes to live through the mortal part of his being; that is what brings disappointment. For he knows only that part of his being which is mortal, and he identifies himself with his mortal being. Hardly one among thousands realizes that life lives and death dies. That which lives cannot die; what dies will not live; it is only a phenomenon of life that makes even that which is not living, for the moment, a kind of illusion of life.

人的錯誤在於，他企圖藉由自身會朽壞的部分來生活；正是這樣，才帶來失望。因為他只認識自己那個會朽壞的部分，並將自我等同於那個必死的存在。在千百人之中，幾乎沒有一個人意識到：生命是活的，而死亡是死的。真正活著的不能死去；會死的也不會活過來。生命的現象只不過讓本來不活的東西，在片刻之間呈現出彷彿生命的假象。

When we study the dead body, the greatest study we can make, we see that no sooner has life left it than the whole charm of the body has gone. Why is there not that attraction which has always been there? Why is the body void of all beauty, magnetism and attraction? Why do those who loved that person retire from his dead body, wish to remove it? What has gone from it, what is dead in it? The part which is subject to death, is dead; the life which lived in it, is still alive. This body was only covering a life; now that life has left. But the living being is not dead; it is that mortal cover which was covering that life that is dead. Is it not, then, the absence of this knowledge which gives a person fear of death?

當我們研究屍體──那是人生最深刻的一門學問──我們會看到：生命一旦離去，身體的全部魅力便隨即消失。為什麼原本存在的吸引力不見了？為什麼身體失去所有美感、吸引力與魅力？為什麼曾經愛這個人的人，如今卻退避他冰冷的軀體、希望將它移開？究竟是什麼離開了？什麼死去了？那個會死的部分死了；而曾在其中活著的生命，仍然是活著的。身體只是覆蓋著生命的一層外衣，如今生命離去了；但真正的生命並未死亡──死亡的，只是那層覆蓋生命、注定朽壞的外殼。那麼，讓人懼怕死亡的，不正是缺乏這份理解嗎？

What is death after all? There is the saying of the Prophet that the illuminated souls never fear death. Death is the last thing they fear. And yet one does not fear for anything more than for one’s life. One could sacrifice anything in the world, wealth, rank, power or possession, if one could live. If living is an innate desire, then it is most necessary to find the process, the way how to get in touch with that real part of ourselves which may be called our being, our self, and thus to become free from what is called mortality. It is the ignorant one who knows only the ground-floor of his house; by going to the first floor of his house, he thinks that he is dead; he does not know that he has only left the ground-floor and is going to the first floor. Why does this ignorance exist? Because he never tried to go to the first floor. The ground-floor is quite enough for him; the first floor does not exist for him, though it is a floor in his own house.

究竟什麼是死亡？先知曾說，光啟的靈魂從不害怕死亡；死亡是他們最不畏懼的事。然而，人卻沒有什麼比自己的生命更恐懼失去的。如果能活下去，他願意犧牲世間的一切──財富、地位、權勢或所有物。若「活著」是一種與生俱來的渴望，那麼最重要的，就是找到方法、找到那條能讓我們觸及自身真實部分──也就是我們的存在本質、我們的自我──的道路，如此才能從所謂的「必死性」中解脫。無知的人只知道自己房子的底層；當他走上樓上的第一層時，他以為自己死了。他不知道，他不過是離開底層，走向第一層而已。這無知為什麼存在？因為他從未嘗試踏上第一層。底層對他來說已經夠了；第一層對他而言根本不存在──儘管那其實是他自己房子裡的另一層樓。

Is immortality to be gained, to be acquired? No, it is to be discovered. One has only to make one’s vision keener, in other words, to explore one’s self; but that is the last thing one does. People are most pleased to explore the tomb of Tut-ank-Amen in Egypt, in order to find mysteries, regardless of the mystery hidden in their own heart. Tell them about any mystery existing outside themselves: they are delighted to explore it. But when you tell them to see in themselves, they think it is too simple; they think, “I know myself. I am a mortal being. I don’t want to die, but death awaits me.” Difficulties they make; complexities they raise by their own complex intelligence. They do not like the straight way; they like the zigzag way; they enjoy puzzles. Even if there is a door before them, they say, “No, I do not look for it.” If a door opens before them, they do not wish to go out by that door; they prefer to be in the puzzle. It is a greater joy not to be able to find the door for a long time. One who is thus enjoying the puzzle, is horrified when he sees the way out.

不死性（永生不朽）是靠獲得、靠取得的嗎？不是的，它是要被發現的。人只需要讓自己的視野更加敏銳──換句話說，就是探索自己的內在──但這卻是人最不願意做的事。人們樂於去探索埃及圖坦卡門的陵墓，以發掘種種奧祕，卻無視自己心中所隱藏的奧祕。只要是自身之外的神祕，他們都樂於探究；但若你要他們向內觀看，他們便覺得這太簡單，會說：「我了解我自己。我是一個凡人。我不想死，但死亡正在等我。」種種難題，是他們自己造成的；複雜性，是他們用自己複雜的頭腦製造出來的。他們不喜歡筆直的道路；反而喜歡曲折的路，熱衷於迷宮。即使門就在眼前，他們也說：「不，我不要找它。」即使門開在眼前，他們也不願從那個門走出去；他們寧願待在迷局裡。長時間找不到出口，對他們而言反而更有樂趣。這樣享受迷局的人，一旦看見出口，反而會感到驚恐。

The saying of the Prophet is, “Die before death.” What does it mean? It does not mean, “Commit suicide.” It only means, “Study the condition of death.” One need not die; play it; one should play death and find out what it is. The whole mystical cult is that play, playing death. That play becomes the means by which to understand the mystery hidden behind life.

先知曾說：「在死亡之前先死亡。」這句話是什麼意思呢？它並不意味著「自殺」。它僅是指：「去研究死亡的狀態。」人不必真的死去；而是要「演練死亡」──去扮演死亡，從中了解死亡究竟是什麼。整個祕士修行的核心，就是這個「演練死亡」的遊戲。透過這個遊戲，人才能理解生命背後隱藏的奧祕。

Man constitutes in himself spirit and matter. What is matter? Crystallized spirit. What is spirit? The original substance. Spirit may be likened to running water; matter to ice. But if there is water and ice, the water will run, the ice will stay where it is. It does not mean that ice will not return to its original condition; it will; but its time has not yet come. Therefore the water will proceed first, and the ice will stay where it is; the substance stays where it is, but the life, the spirit, passes away. What is necessary, before, for a person, is to make the spirit independent of the mortal covering, even if it be for a moment. By that the fear of death naturally vanishes, because then one begins to see the condition after death here on earth. It is this physical cover which has imprisoned, so to speak, the soul in it; and the soul finds itself in prison and it cannot see itself. What it can see is the cover.

人由靈（Spirit）與物質構成。那麼，什麼是物質？物質是結晶化的靈。那麼，什麼是靈？靈是原始的本質。靈可比作奔流的水，物質則如冰。然而，若同時有水與冰，水會流動，而冰則停留在原地。這並不表示冰無法回到它的原始狀態；它會回去，只是時機尚未到來。因此，水會先行，冰則仍在原地；物質仍留在原地，但生命，也就是靈，卻流逝。對於人而言，首要的必要，是讓靈能獨立於會朽壞的外殼之外，即便只是片刻。如此一來，對死亡的恐懼自然消失，因為人便開始能看見死亡之後在世間的狀態。正是這層肉身，從某種意義上囚禁了靈魂；靈魂因此覺得自己被囚禁，無法看見自己。它所能看到的，僅是那層覆蓋物而已。

Rumi explains it most beautifully in a poem which he has written on sleep, because it is in sleep that the soul naturally becomes independent of this mortal garb. He says:

魯米在一首關於睡眠的詩中，對此有最美的闡述，因為靈魂在睡眠中自然地擺脫了這具會朽壞的軀體。他寫道：

Every night Thou freest our spirits from the bodyAnd its snare, making them pure as rased tablets.Every night spirits are released from this cage,And set free, neither lording it nor lorded over.At night prisoners are unaware of their prison;At night kings are unaware of their majesty.Then there is no thought or care for loss or gain;No regard to such a one or such a one.

每個夜晚，祢都將我們的靈魂從身體及其陷阱中釋放，使其純潔如同被擦拭乾淨的石板。每個夜晚，靈魂都從這個牢籠中獲得解放，得以自由，不以支配也不受支配。夜晚裡，囚徒不覺得自己被囚禁；夜晚裡，君王不覺得自己的尊貴。那時，既無對失去或獲得的思慮，也無對這人或那人的偏顧。

And the continual longing of the soul is for freedom from this imprisonment. Rumi begins his book, the Masnavi, with this lamentation of the soul, to free itself. But is it to free the soul by actual death, by a suicide? No! No mystics have done it; it is not meant. It is by playing death that one arrives at the knowledge of life and death, and it is the secret of life which will make the soul free. The different planes of existence, which are hidden behind the cover of this physical body, then begin to manifest to the person who plays death. All different ways of concentration, of Meditation, which are prescribed by the teacher to the pupil, are all that process of playing. In themselves they are nothing; they are a play.

靈魂持續不斷的渴望，就是能從這種囚禁中得到自由。魯米以靈魂對自由的哀嘆作為《瑪斯納維》的開場。然而，是否意味著要透過真正的死亡、透過自殺來解放靈魂呢？不！沒有一位祕士如此做，也不是這個意思。透過「扮演死亡」的方式，人才能抵達對生與死的理解，而正是生命的奧祕使靈魂得以自由。當一個人「扮演死亡」時，被這具肉身遮蔽的不同存在層面就開始向他顯現。一切由導師指示給學生的各種專注方式、各種冥想方式，全都是這種「扮演」的過程。它們本身並不是什麼，只是一種遊戲。

What is important, is what one finds out as an outcome of that play; what one discovers in the end. Of course, the play begins with self-negation. And a person who likes to say twenty times in the day, “I”, does not like to say, “I am not, Thou art.” But he does not know that this claim of “I” is the root of all his trouble. It is this claim that makes him feel hurt by every little insult, by every little disturbance. The amount of pain that this illusion gives him is so great that it is just as well he got rid of it. But that is the last thing he would do. He would give up his last penny, but not the thought of “I.” He would hold it; it is the dearest thing. That is the whole difficulty and the only hindrance on the spiritual path.

真正重要的，是人在這個「扮演」的過程中最終所發現、所領悟的。當然，這個遊戲是從「消抹自我」開始的。而一個一天之中可以說二十次「我」的人，卻不願意說：「我不存在，唯有祢存在。」但他不知道，這個「我」的主張正是他所有困擾的根源。也正是這個「我」讓他因每一點小小的侮辱、每一次微小的干擾而受傷。這個幻象帶給他的痛苦如此之深，能夠擺脫它其實是極好的事。然而，這卻是他最不願意做的事。他寧可放棄自己最後一枚錢幣，也不願放棄那個「我」的念頭。他緊緊抓著它，因為那是他最珍視的。這就是整個困難之所在，也是人在靈性道路上唯一的阻礙。

Very often people ask, “How long has one to go on on the spiritual path?” There is no limit to the length of this path, and yet if one is ready, it does not need a long time. It is a moment and one is there. How true it is, what the wise of past ages said to their followers, “Do not go directly into the temple; first walk fifty times around it!” The meaning was, “First get a little tired, then enter.” Then you value it. One values something for which one makes an effort; if it comes without effort, it is nothing to one. If a government should ask a tax for the air one breathes, people would protest against it. Yet they do not know that there is no comparison between the air and the money they possess. The value of the one is incomparably greater than of the other. And yet the most valuable things are attained with least effort. But one does not realize their importance. One would rather have something which is attained with a great effort and in the end may prove to be nothing.

人們經常問：「在靈性道路上，需行多久？」這條道路的長度是無限的，但如果一個人準備好了，其實不需要很長的時間。只是一個瞬間，就可抵達。古代智者對弟子說的話是多麼真實：「不要直接進入神殿；先繞它走五十圈！」其意義是：「先稍微疲累，再進入。」這樣你才會珍惜。人會珍惜那些需要付出努力才能獲得的事物；若不費力而得，對人而言毫無價值。若政府對你呼吸的空氣課稅，人們一定會抗議。然而，他們卻不知道，空氣的價值與他們所擁有的金錢相比，根本無法相比。前者的價值遠遠超過後者。即便如此，最有價值的事物往往只需最小的努力便可獲得，但人卻未能意識到其重要性。他們寧願追求那些耗費極大努力，但最終可能毫無價值的事物。

It is very simple to think, “Why should every being have that innate desire to live, if continual life is impossible?” For there is no desire in the world which has not its answer. The answer to every desire is somewhere; the fulfillment of every desire must come one day. Therefore, without doubt this desire of living must be fulfilled. And the fulfillment of this desire is in getting above the illusion which is caused by ignorance of the secret of life.

想一想，其實非常簡單：「如果永恆的生命不可能存在，為什麼每個生命都會有與生俱來的生存渴望呢？」世上沒有任何渴望是沒有答案的。每個渴望的答案都存在於某處；每個渴望的實現終將到來。因此，毋庸置疑，這份生存的渴望必將得到滿足。而這份渴望的實現，就是超越由於對生命奧祕無知而產生的幻象。