4. The Education of Youth
青年的教育

i. Ages 13 to 15
13 至 15 歲

The age between thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen years is the time when childhood is ending, and it is the beginning of youth. On one side there is the urge of youth and on the other side childhood ending; it brings about an inner struggle in the child. The child is neither a youth nor a child, and therefore there is a struggle in its being. That is why some children appear to be very nervous at that time. This age is the period of Kemal, the period of inner conflict. And when the guardian is unaware of this inner conflict, he will find in the child a very troublesome element showing itself in many forms; but when the guardian understands that this time in the life of the child is a time of conflict, he will treat it differently.

十三、十四、十五歲之間，是童年即將結束、青年時期開始的階段。一方面有青春的衝動，另一方面童年又正在退去；這便在孩子內在帶來一種掙扎。孩子既不完全是青年，也不再只是兒童，因此其存在中便有一種衝突。這就是為什麼有些孩子在那個時期顯得特別緊張不安。這個年齡是圓熟 (Kemal) 的時期，是內在衝突的時期。當監護者沒有察覺這種內在衝突時，便會發現孩子身上出現各種令人頭痛的表現；但當監護者明白，孩子生命中的這段時期本就是衝突的時期時，他對待孩子的方式便會不同。

It is the time when the child must be handled most carefully. A child will show moments of passiveness and moments of activeness; at times the child will show presence of mind and at other times it will be absent-minded. The mind of the child is beginning to form at that time, and the foundation of the mind is being laid in that period.

這正是最需要小心對待孩子的時候。孩子會有安靜被動的時刻，也會有活躍主動的時刻；有時會顯得很有臨機應變的能力，有時又會心不在焉。孩子的頭腦正在這個時期開始成形，而頭腦的基礎也正是在這段期間奠立的。

In the period of Kemal three aspects of knowledge should be taught to the child: the knowledge of the land, of the water, and of the sky.

在此「圓熟」的時期，應當教導孩子三方面的知識：土地的知識、水的知識，以及天空的知識。

• The knowledge of the land is the knowledge of what is produced in the land, in the mineral and vegetable kingdoms.
• The knowledge of the water is of the creatures that live in the water, the dangers of the water, and the way that men travel and have travelled over the sea.
• The knowledge of the sky is about the stars and planets, the sun and the moon and the effect of wind and storm.
  
• 土地的知識，是關於土地所生產的一切，包括礦物界與植物界。
• 水的知識，是關於生活在水中的生物、水的危險，以及人類如何在海上航行、又曾如何跨海旅行。
• 天空的知識，是關於星辰與行星、太陽與月亮，以及風與暴風的影響。

The reason why this particular knowledge should be given at this time is that the mind is not yet definitely formed, and it should be based from the beginning on wide lines, in order that a wide building may be created on that foundation.

之所以在這個時期給予這些特別的知識，是因為頭腦尚未完全定型，從一開始就應以寬廣的路線作為基礎，如此才能在這基礎上建造出寬廣的建築。

At that time, it is better to help the child, whether boy or girl, to keep a passive rather than an active attitude, because it is the time of absorption and not the time of expression. By urging a passive attitude upon the child one will only make it uncomfortable; but by cultivating that attitude gently, without allowing the child to know it, one will prepare the soil of its mind for a better purpose. It is, however, a difficult problem. One can cultivate a passive attitude in the child by trying to attract its interest to one’s words and actions.

在那個時期，不論男孩或女孩，較好的方式是幫助孩子保持一種偏向接受而非表達的態度，因為這是吸收的時期，而不是表現的時期。若強行要求孩子採取被動的態度，只會使他感到不自在；但若以溫和的方式培養這種態度，而不讓孩子察覺，便是在為他的頭腦土壤預備更好的目的。然而，這確實是一個困難的課題。要培養孩子這種接受性的態度，可以藉著設法吸引他對監護者言語與行動的興趣來達成。

It is not desirable to force the development of spiritual tendencies in early youth; but it is desirable to help to develop what little spiritual tendency there is.

在青春初期，並不適合強迫發展靈性的傾向；但適合幫助那已經存在的一點點靈性傾向，讓他慢慢成長。

Youth is the time for definite religious education. If that time is past, then a person is always shy of taking part in religion. However much attracted he may be to religion and to the religious ideal, he feels awkward and shy about it, and he does not come forward to take his part in it. One may ask if it is better to bring a child up first in one religion and to make it acquainted with other religions later on, or to teach it from the beginning that all religions are one. First the child must know one religion in order to know all religions. If it has not come to understand one religion it will not come to the understanding of all religions. Broadness is the result and not the beginning. If you make a person too broad in the beginning, in the end he will become narrow.

青年時期，是接受明確宗教教育的時候。若這段時期錯過了，一個人往往總會對參與宗教感到害羞。無論他多麼被宗教和宗教理想所吸引，他仍會感到尷尬與羞怯，無法自然地走出來參與其中。有人也許會問，是不是最好先讓孩子在一個宗教中長大，之後再使他認識其他宗教；還是應當從一開始就教導他所有宗教原是一體？孩子必須先認識一個宗教，才能認識所有宗教。若他尚未理解一個宗教，也就無法理解所有宗教。寬廣是結果，而不是起點。若一開始就把一個人弄得太過寬泛，到了最後，他反而會變得狹隘。

The culture of the mind has five different aspects. First, thought and imagination. Thought is one thing, and imagination is another. Very often people confuse these two words. Thinking is an automatic action of mind, there is no will-power behind it. Therefore the dream is an imagination; only it is called a dream because it is more concrete; when a person is asleep and the senses are closed there is nothing but the imagination before the mind. But in the case of imagination in the waking state there is on one side imagination and on the other side the action of the five senses, and then imagination plays a passive part.

頭腦的培養有五個不同的面向。第一，是思想與想像。思想是一回事，想像則是另一回事。人們常常把這兩個詞混淆。思考是頭腦的一種自動作用，其背後並沒有意志力。因此，夢是一種想像；只是因為它較為具體，所以才被稱為夢。當人睡著、感官關閉時，呈現在頭腦面前的除了想像別無他物。但在清醒狀態下的想像，一方面有想像，另一方面又有五種感官的作用，因此此時想像扮演的是較被動的角色。

In helping the child to cultivate thought and imagination one may also make a mistake. Once I visited a school of thought culture. They had made a new system, and I went to see it. There were ten or twelve children standing, and the teacher said, “Look, what is there here?” There was nothing but a plain board before them. One child says, “A lily.” The teacher says “All right.” To another child he says, “Look, what is here?” The other child looks and says, “A red rose.” The teacher is satisfied. And to the third child he says, “See, what is here?” The child says, “It is a pink rose”, and again the teacher is satisfied. And then he asks another child to tell what is there, and the child says, “I do not see anything.” I thought to myself, “He is the one who has some sense, for he did not tell a lie.’

在幫助孩子培養思想與想像時，也可能犯錯。有一次我參觀一所訓練思想能力的學校。他們創出一套新制度，我便去看看。那裡有十來個孩子站著，老師說：「看，這裡有什麼？」他們面前除了空白的板子以外，什麼也沒有。一個孩子說：「一朵百合花。」老師說：「很好。」他又對另一個孩子說：「看，這裡有什麼？」另一個孩子看著說：「一朵紅玫瑰。」老師很滿意。接著他又對第三個孩子說：「看，這裡是什麼？」孩子說：「是一朵粉紅玫瑰。」老師又很滿意。然後他再問另一個孩子那裡有什麼，那孩子說：「我什麼都沒看見。」我心裡想：「這孩子才算有幾分判斷，因為他沒有說謊。」

Now, what good will it do to the children, who say whatever comes into their heads, but have seen nothing? It is only making them imaginative and after that, what? Only worse; and after that still worse. The fate of these ten or twelve children will be the worst fate. Imagine them learning for five or six years this kind of thought-culture, by which they allow their imagination to run freely and believe that they see what they have imagined with their eyes on the board! It can only lead to what might be called mediumistic culture.

那麼，讓孩子把腦中浮現的東西隨口說出來，明明什麼也沒看見，這對他們究竟有什麼益處呢？這只是在使他們變得更愛幻想，而之後呢？只會更糟；再之後還會更糟。這十來個孩子的結果會是最糟的結果。試想，如果他們五、六年都在學這種所謂的思想訓練，使自己的想像任意奔馳，還相信自己眼睛真的在板子上看見了那些自己想像出來的東西！這最終只會導向一種可稱為通靈式的培養。

The right way of helping the imagination of the child is to direct its attention to all that is beautiful, and then see what it would like to add to it to complete the beauty, be it the beauty of line, of color, of notes, or of rhythm, be it the beauty of idea, beauty of action, or beauty of meaning. In this way the child’s imagination could develop. If one asks the child, “What would you do in this situation?” “What would you like to do to make it complete?” “What would you do to make it more beautiful?”, in this way one helps the child to develop its faculty of imagination.

幫助孩子發展想像力的正確方式，是引導他注意一切美的事物，然後看看他會想為這份美再增添什麼，使其更趨完整；無論是線條之美、色彩之美、音符之美、節奏之美，或是觀念之美、行動之美、意義之美，皆是如此。用這樣的方式，孩子的想像力便能發展起來。若有人問孩子：「在這種情況下你會怎麼做？」、「你想做什麼，讓它變得更完整？」、「你會怎麼做，讓它更美？」便是在用這種方式幫助孩子發展他的想像能力。

But then comes the question of how to develop a child’s thought. The thought of a child cannot be developed by getting it to think on love, or on kindness, or goodness, or anything like that. As soon as the child is given a thought to hold on to it feels uncomfortable, uneasy, just as a mule would feel the burden on its back. The best way is to find out what it is thinking of and to strengthen that thought, if the thought is desirable.

但接著便會出現另一個問題：要如何發展孩子的思想呢？孩子的思想，不能靠叫他們去想愛、想仁慈、想善良，或任何這類抽象觀念而發展起來。孩子一旦被給予一個思想，要他抓住不放，就會感到不舒服、不自在，正如騾子背上壓了重擔一般。最好的方法，是先發現他本來就在想什麼，若那個想法是可取的，就去加強他。

For example, a child said to its guardian, “I would like to have a magic wand. Where could I get it?” The guardian said, “If you had a magic wand what would you do with it?” The child answered, “I heard that if a person has a magic wand, he has only to wave it and everything will come.” So the guardian said, “What do you wish?” At first the child hesitated, because he felt very shy about telling his wish, but in the end he expressed his wish. As soon as the guardian knew he said, “You do not need a magic wand; the wish itself is a power if you can think about it.” The child said, “I always think about it.” The guardian said, “Think about it still more.” It is not giving a child a new thought, but just strengthening its thought. From that moment the child who was looking for a magic wand thought the magic wand was in itself; that if it thought about the magic wand it would get what it wanted.

例如，有個孩子對監護者說：「我想要一根魔杖。我可以在哪裡得到呢？」監護者說：「如果你有一根魔杖，你會拿它做什麼？」孩子回答：「我聽說，如果一個人有魔杖，只要揮一揮，所有東西就都會來。」於是監護者問：「那你希望得到什麼呢？」起初孩子遲疑了，因為他對說出自己的願望感到很害羞；但最後他還是把願望說了出來。監護者一明白之後，便說：「你不需要魔杖；若你能一直想著那個願望，願望本身就是一種力量。」孩子說：「我一直都在想它啊。」監護者便說：「那就再多想一點。」這不是給孩子一個新的思想，而只是加強原本的思想。從那一刻起，那個原本在尋找魔杖的孩子，開始明白魔杖就在自己裡面；只要他一直想著這根魔杖，就會得到自己想要的東西。

A child always has a good memory, but it acts only in things it is interested in. Where the child has no interest it will not remember. It does not mean that it cannot remember, but that it will not remember. It is not a mistake of the child’s memory, but it is the mistake of those who force upon its memory something that will not stay there. And very often the greatest mistake of school-teachers is that they force upon the mind of the child something in which it is not interested, that it does not want to look at, or think about. How cruel it is that in order that the child should pass an examination, its mind should be forced and urged to hold an idea which it is not capable of holding! The best way of developing a child’s memory is to give it something it remembers, likes, and is interested in, and to ask the child about it, to take an interest in it oneself and to keep that flame burning.

孩子一向都有很好的記憶力，只是他的記憶力只運用在自己有興趣的事物上。若孩子對某事沒有興趣，他就不會記住。這並不表示他不能記，而是他不願意去記。這不是孩子記憶力的錯，而是那些硬把某些無法留存之物塞進其記憶中的人的錯。而學校老師常犯的最大錯誤之一，就是硬把孩子毫無興趣、不願看、不願想的東西強加到他們的頭腦裡。為了讓孩子通過考試，竟強迫其頭腦去抓住一個他根本無法承載的觀念，這是多麼殘酷啊！發展孩子記憶力最好的方式，是給他一些他能記住、也喜歡、也有興趣的東西，並且問他相關的事，自己也對此表現出興趣，讓那團火焰持續燃燒。

Many children do not like the study of mathematics. If it is not their temperament, if it is not in their nature they will not like it. Mathematics are easy for those who have that temperament, who are born with that tendency; but there is another tendency which is quite opposite to figures, to mathematics.

許多孩子不喜歡數學。若那不是他們的氣質，若那不在他們的天性之中，他們就不會喜歡。對於那些具有這種氣質、天生就傾向於數字與數學的人來說，數學是容易的；但也有另一種傾向，是與數字、與數學完全相反的。

When a child is interested, for instance, in poetry, and yet cannot remember it, this shows that it has no concentration; but that will improve by giving the child a greater interest in poetry, and encouraging it to read it more and to recite it, and by showing appreciation of what it does. Very often a guardian is interested in telling a story to a child, but is not interested in hearing that story from the child. But this is a great training if one can do it; if having told a story to the child one asks it to tell the story again after three months, and then sees how its memory works. In this way memory can be developed.

例如，若一個孩子對詩有興趣，卻仍然記不住，這就表示他缺乏專注；但只要進一步培養他對詩的興趣，鼓勵他多讀、多背誦，並且對他所做的表現出欣賞，這種情況便會改善。很多時候，監護者喜歡對孩子說故事，卻不喜歡聽孩子把故事再說一遍。但若能這樣做，其實是一種很好的訓練；譬如說完一個故事之後，三個月後再請孩子把這故事重新講一遍，然後看看他的記憶是如何運作的。記憶力便能以這樣的方式被培養起來。

Some children have the reasoning faculty developed in them and others have not. But this is a faculty upon which the future of the child depends, upon which its whole life depends. Where the reasoning faculty is not developed there is always a danger for its life. It can be easily cultivated in the child by asking questions for and against everything: if it must be, why it must be; and if it must not be, why it must not be; and sometimes quite the contrary question. When a child says, “This is right”, it must be asked why it is right; if the child says, “This is wrong”, it must be asked why it is wrong. The guardian must take the same attitude that the child has, always asking why, instead of letting the child ask why. The guardian must become a child and ask why of everything; and in this way reasoning is developed. Any child that shows the quality of reasoning has the promise of a wonderful future before it.

有些孩子的推理能力已經發展起來了，有些則還沒有。但這是一種孩子未來所倚賴的能力，甚至可以說，整個人生都繫於此。若推理能力沒有發展起來，生命中便總是存在危險。要在孩子身上培養這種能力，其實很容易，只要對每件事都提出正反兩面的問題：若某件事必須如此，為什麼必須如此；若某件事不應如此，為什麼不應如此；有時甚至還要問完全相反的問題。當孩子說：「這是對的」，就必須問他為什麼對；若孩子說：「這是錯的」，就必須問他為什麼錯。監護者應當採取和孩子相同的態度，不是讓孩子總在問為什麼，而是監護者自己總是在問為什麼。監護者必須成為孩子，對一切事物發問「為什麼」；推理能力便會這樣被發展出來。凡是展現出推理品質的孩子，前面都有一個極其美好的未來在等待著他。

It is not always advisable to play with children’s emotions. Often it might be a pleasure to the guardian to see how the child is affected by a certain thought, by a certain word. But by doing this one weakens that faculty. The best thing is to keep the feeling of the child untouched, in order that this deepest faculty may grow still deeper and stronger, so that when the child comes to the age when its emotion must show itself, it is perfected.

並不是任何時候都適合去撥弄孩子的情感。監護者有時也許會從中得到一種愉悅，看見孩子如何因某個想法、某句話而受到觸動；但這樣做其實會削弱那種能力。最好的方式，是讓孩子的情感保持不被干擾，好使這最深的一種能力能成長得更深、更強，直到孩子到了情感應當自然顯現的年齡時，其已趨於成熟。

In the culture of mind the most important problem is the thought of “I”; and this thought develops very strongly in a child of thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen. It is very keen about saying I and me. And if this faculty is softened at that particular period in childhood, while the child is growing up, it will be much better. This faculty shows itself especially when the child is cross, when it is in a temper, when it wants to defend itself, and when it wants to express, “This I own, this is mine, and nobody else must touch it, and nobody else must take it.” At such times it must be softened. At thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen the child is more thoughtful, and if at times of anger there is an effort made by the guardians to help it to look at things rightly and from their point of view, it is easier at this time than it was in its early childhood.

在頭腦的培養中，最重要的問題是「我」這個念頭；而這個念頭在十三、十四、十五歲的孩子身上發展得特別強烈。孩子會特別強烈地說「我」與「我的」。若在這個特殊的童年成長階段，能將這種能力稍稍柔化，情況便會好得多。這種能力特別會表現在孩子不高興時、發脾氣時、想保護自己時，以及想表達「這是我的，這是我擁有的，誰都不可以碰，誰都不可以拿走」的時候。這種時刻，就必須設法將它柔化。到了十三、十四、十五歲，孩子已經更有思考能力，因此若監護者在他生氣時，努力幫助他正確地看事情，也從別人的觀點來看事情，那麼在這個時期要做到這一點，會比在他更幼小的童年時期容易得多。

ii

Youth is divided into three parts. Thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen years are early youth; sixteen, seventeen, and eighteen, the middle part of youth; nineteen, twenty and twenty-one, complete youth.

青年分為三個階段。十三、十四、十五歲是青年初期；十六、十七、十八歲是青年中期；十九、二十、二十一歲則是完整的青年期。

There is a tendency on the part of guardians to encourage the development of a youth in whatever direction he chooses to take. But to encourage a youth in any direction is like urging on a very energetic horse which is already running fast. What a youth needs most is not encouragement; what he needs most is balance. The tendency of a youth, both in the right direction and the wrong direction, may prove satisfactory in the end if his action is not evenly balanced.

監護者常有一種傾向，就是鼓勵青年朝著他自己所選擇的任何方向去發展。然而，鼓勵青年朝任何一個方向衝去，就像催促一匹已在奔騰的烈馬更快向前。青年最需要的，不是鼓勵；他最需要的是平衡。青年無論朝正確方向或錯誤方向發展，若其行動缺乏均衡，最終的結果都可能不令人滿意。

There are two important things to be considered by guardians in the development of the youth. One is that very often guardians think this is the same child who used to be a baby and a little child running about, and they go on treating the youth in the same way as they have done before. They underestimate his comprehension, his maturity of mind, the development of his spirit; and in this way very often they delude themselves. And then there are others who take the opposite course. When the youth begins to say things that show a greater intelligence, they believe that they can tell him anything and everything, without waiting for the appropriate time to mention a certain thing, a certain idea. And therefore mistakes may be made both by considering a youth to be an experienced person, and also by considering him to be still a child that does not know anything.

在青年發展的過程中，監護者有兩件重要的事需要留意。其一是，監護者常常以為，眼前這個青年仍是那個曾經是嬰孩、曾經跑來跑去的小孩子，於是仍用從前的方式對待他。他們低估了青年的理解力、頭腦的成熟度，以及其靈性的發展；如此一來，他們往往只是自我蒙蔽。另一種人則走向相反的一端。當青年開始說出一些顯示較高智慧的話時，他們便以為可以對他談任何事、講一切觀念，而不等待適當的時機才提起某件事、某個想法。因此，把青年看作一個有經驗的大人，或把他仍當成一個什麼都不懂的孩子，兩者都可能造成錯誤。

It is mostly the education of the home, if it is not given properly, that spoils a youth. The time of youth is a time of nervousness, of restlessness, and of agitation. If the education given at home antagonizes the youth, he is spoiled for ever. If the good opinion that he had before of his guardians is changed, then youth is the time when guardian and child become estranged; youth builds a wall between the guardian and the growing child. The growing child finds consolation with friends, with neighbors, with acquaintances, who sometimes take advantage by saying, “Yes, you are right. Your people at home do not understand you. It is a great pity, it is a shame,” and that great opportunity of making the link with the youth more strong is lost by the guardians who do not understand this situation properly. A child who shows friendship, response, and the feeling of comradeship with the guardian during his youth, will be a great friend all his life.

青年是否變壞，多半取決於家庭教育是否得當。青年期是緊張、躁動、騷動不安的時期。若家中所給予的教育與青年對抗，那麼他就會被永遠地變質。若他原先對監護者的良好觀感發生了改變，那麼青年期便成了監護者與孩子彼此疏遠的時期；青年在監護者與成長中的孩子之間築起一道牆。正在成長的孩子會轉而從朋友、鄰居、熟人那裡尋求安慰，而那些人有時還會趁機說：「是啊，你是對的。你家裡的人並不了解你。這真可惜，真令人遺憾。」於是，那個本來可以使與青年之間的連結更加牢固的大好機會，就被那些未能正確理解這種處境的監護者失去了。若一個孩子在青年時期，對監護者表現出友誼、回應，以及夥伴般的情感，那麼他一生都會是一位很好的朋友。

It is like training a horse. There is a certain time when a horse learns to obey, but if at that time the trainer makes a mistake, that mistake remains for ever in the horse. And if at the time of maturity of its mind, when the horse is beginning to respond to the trainer, it is given a right direction, then all through life that horse works rightly.

這就像訓練一匹馬。有一個特定的時期，馬會學習服從；但若訓練者在那時犯了錯，那個錯誤就會永遠留在馬身上。而若在牠心智成熟、開始回應訓練者的那段時期，給予牠正確的引導，那麼牠一生都會朝正確的方向工作。

Some guardians show their helplessness in not being able to control a youth, and criticize the youth who is not under their control and does not listen to them; they think it is hopeless, that the youth is spoiled, and that he is gone out of their hands. They help the child very little, because they are only conscious of his bad points; and by showing their dissatisfaction they do not help the youth, they spoil him. The guardians need not be severe with the youth, they need not be too firm, nor too pessimistic in regard to his advancement. The more they trust him and the more they have confidence in themselves, the more they are able to help the child. Nothing helps more than trusting in the good points of the youth, appreciating them, and encouraging him in that direction.

有些監護者因無法控制青年而顯出自己的無助，並批評那個不受他們控制、也不聽從他們的青年；他們覺得已經沒有希望了，覺得青年已經變壞，也覺得他已經脫離了自己的掌握。他們其實很少真正幫助到孩子，因為他們的意識只放在青年的缺點上；而他們所表現出的不滿，不但沒有幫助到青年，反而損毀了他。監護者不必對青年過於嚴厲，不必太過強硬，也不必對他的進展過於悲觀。他們越是信任青年，也越是對自己有信心，就越能幫助孩子。沒有什麼比信任青年身上的好品質、欣賞那些品質，並在那個方向上鼓勵他，更能帶來幫助。

There are, however, others who out of their love and sympathy spoil the youth. They pour out so much love and sympathy that it blinds them in what they are doing. Also the child is not meant to be for ever with the guardians. What will happen when the guardian is not there and the child has to face the world? Everybody will not spoil him, everybody will not give sympathy; and then the life of the child in the world will become wretched. Often children who happen to be the only child of their parents or in the family, and who are much cared for and receive much sympathy and love, become so spoiled that the very sympathy and love that has been given them proves to be a bitter pill. They never receive it again in life, and all through life they suffer for it.

然而，也有一些人因著自己的愛與同情而把青年寵壞了。他們傾注太多的愛與同情，以至於這反而使他們看不清自己正在做什麼。而且，孩子本來就不是要永遠和監護者在一起的。當監護者不在身邊，而孩子必須獨自面對世界時，會發生什麼事呢？不是每個人都會寵著他，也不是每個人都會同情他；於是，孩子在世上的生活便會變得悲慘。那些恰好是父母唯一的孩子，或在家中備受照顧、得到很多同情與愛的孩子，常常會被寵壞到一個地步，以致曾經給予他們的那份同情與愛，反而成了苦藥。他們此後在人生中再也得不到同樣的對待，並且一生都為此受苦。

It is wiser for the guardians to make a point of decreasing the strong hold that they had on a child as it grows to become a youth. But how can they decrease it? Just as a rider makes the rein looser and looser, but gradually. Those who do not understand this have kept it firm in childhood, and then in youth have let it go. But it must be loosened gradually, and it must be loosened on the lines of the child’s development. At every step forward in development of personality, of humanity, one must trust the youth and give that much more freedom of thought and action, yet holding the rein and keeping it firm, being conscious of the responsibility of the guardians to help the youth through that most critical period.

較有智慧的做法，是監護者在孩子逐漸長成青年時，有意識地減弱自己原先對孩子那種強力的掌控。但要如何減弱呢？就像騎手慢慢地把韁繩放鬆一樣，只是要漸進地放鬆。不明白這一點的人，往往是在孩子童年時把韁繩拉得很緊，到了青年期卻一下子全放開了。然而，韁繩必須逐漸地放鬆，並且要依著孩子發展的脈絡來放鬆。當人格的發展、人性的發展每向前一步，就應當多信任青年一分，也相應地多給予一分思想與行動的自由；但同時仍要握住韁繩，使其保持穩妥，清楚意識到監護者有責任帶領青年走過這段最關鍵的時期。

The best way of helping the youth is to give him desirable impressions of conditions, of situations, of personalities, and in this way, by giving him impressions, to let the child learn by himself without being taught in words.

幫助青年的最好方式，是給予他對環境、處境、人格類型的良好印象；藉著這樣的印象，使孩子不必透過言語教訓，也能自己學會。

There is a story of a father who saw that his young son had a tendency to certain vices. He told him often to keep away from them but the boy would not listen. He did everything in his power; in the end, when he was dying, he called his son and said, “Now I will never tell you any more not to do things that you have always liked to do. But will you remember the last words of your father, that whenever you want to gamble you must gamble with the greatest gamblers, and whenever you feel like drinking you must drink with great drunkards.”

有一個故事說到，一位父親看見自己的年幼兒子有一些走向惡習的傾向。他常常勸他遠離那些習慣，但那孩子並不聽從。他已經盡其所能；最後，在臨終時，他把兒子叫到身邊，說：「現在我再也不會對你說，不要去做那些你一直喜歡做的事了。但你願不願意記住你父親最後的話：每當你想賭博時，你一定要和最厲害的賭徒賭；每當你想喝酒時，你一定要和最厲害的酒鬼一起喝。」

The son thought these last words more desirable than anything he had heard from his father before. And when he went to gamble he began to ask people, “Who are the great gamblers in the city?” They said, “Great gamblers are not to be found in gambling houses. You must go and look for them outside the city.” So when he had heard their names he went there. He found that they were playing with pebbles, because they had lost all the money they had. And he said, “I have heard a great deal about you people, and here you are playing with pebbles. I thought you would be playing for millions of pounds!” They said, “No, we played for millions, and now we are playing for pebbles. Come along, if you wish to play with us. We have nothing more left.”

兒子覺得，這些臨終之言比他從前從父親那裡聽過的任何話都更有吸引力。於是，當他要去賭博時，便開始向人打聽：「城裡最厲害的賭徒是誰？」人們回答說：「真正厲害的賭徒不會在賭場裡找到。你必須到城外去找他們。」於是他打聽到那些人的名字後，就去了那裡。他發現那些人正在用小石子玩，因為他們已經輸光了所有的錢。他說：「我久仰你們的大名，結果你們竟然在這裡玩小石子。我原以為你們玩的是幾百萬英鎊的賭局呢！」他們說：「不，我們以前確實是為幾百萬而賭，現在卻只能玩小石子了。來吧，如果你想和我們一起玩。我們已經什麼都不剩了。」

He got a lesson from this and he said, “Nothing doing in this direction. Now I must go somewhere else to find great drunkards.” And the people in the city gave him two or three names of well-known drunkards and he went there. He did not find any bottles, any drink, nor anything. And he said to them, “I have heard your names. Everybody talks about you; you are great drunkards. But there are no bottles; what are you drinking?” They said, “All the money we had was spent in drinking. No money is left. We have now some snakes. When we want to drink we let the snakes bite us; that gives us a kind of intoxication. If you like we will bring a snake for you.” And he ran away and never came near them again. That gave him another lesson.

他從中得到了一個教訓，便說：「這條路行不通。現在我得去別處找那些最厲害的酒鬼。」城裡的人便給了他兩三個有名酒鬼的名字，他就去了。他沒有看到任何酒瓶、任何酒，什麼都沒有。於是他問他們：「我聽過你們的大名，人人都在談論你們；你們是出了名的酒鬼。可是這裡連酒瓶都沒有；你們到底喝什麼呢？」他們說：「我們所有的錢都拿去喝酒了。現在一點錢也不剩。如今我們養了幾條蛇。每當我們想喝酒時，就讓蛇咬我們，那也能帶來一種迷醉感。你若喜歡，我們也可以替你拿一條蛇來。」他嚇得跑走了，從此再也不靠近他們。這又給了他另一個教訓。

The education of youth depends mostly upon impressions. Sometimes you may make a youth read books and that will not help; and sometimes you may tell the youth fifty times or a hundred times, “This is right”, “This is not right”, “This is not good”, and he will never listen. But once you show him the phenomena, the example of what you are saying, and let the youth see with his own eyes what are the effects of different causes, then the teaching is given in an objective way; and in this manner wise guardians educate a youth.

青年的教育，多半取決於印象。有時你讓青年讀書，卻沒有幫助；有時你對青年說五十次、一百次：「這是對的」、「這是不對的」、「這是不好的」，他也永遠不會聽進去。但只要你把現象本身、把你所說之事的例證呈現在他面前，讓青年親眼看見不同原因所帶來的結果，那麼教導便是以一種客觀的方式被給予；而有智慧的監護者，正是以這樣的方式來教育青年。